With rare exception, my opinion of music writers is not something I can express verbally.  If I tried, it would come out including something about hanging them from their own entrails - with muzzles on so they can't try to use analogies to describe how it feels, and how it relates to the post-crypto stonk-reggae scene of 1973 east Philadelphia, where that drummer who later played with the Glowing Astrodots first met up with...

Anyway, I was just a wee bit skeptical when I read this piece.

"Black Lace hit Agadoo, named the worst song of all time by a panel
of music writers, is being re-released 25 years after it hit number two."
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/7971778.stm
"The song, kept off the top by George Michael's Careless Whisper in 1984, won the title in a 2003 Q magazine poll.
...
The Q magazine panel summed up the 1984 original as "magnificently dreadful".   "It sounded like the school disco you were forced to attend, your
middle-aged relatives forming a conga at a wedding party, a travelling
DJ act based in Wolverhampton, every party cliche you ever heard," the
panel added."

Lending cred to the worst-song claim is this photo and caption,

Other Black Lace hits include Superman and Do The Conga

And these guys had a #2 hit in the UK?  Huh.  Regular readers may remember that this space did condemn most of England to nuclear annihilation a few months ago, after the new ABBA DVD broke sales records.  Sigh... it's always sad to see an empire crumble from within.

But you are still wondering if Agadoo could really be the 'worst song ever'.  Ok then, here ya go.  Thanks to the poor tortured soul who wrote out the lyrics for us.