Don’t Hate Me Because I’m Beautiful
Current mood: fermented
Category: Food and Restaurants
[...when there are so many other reasons! ;-) ]
in my student days, my mates and I used to go out drinking - and then
have farting competitions. Marks were awarded for duration, resonance
of tone, and of course pungency.
We also had burping
competitions, which ran on standardised fuel, this being one chili
dinner and one can of Mt Dew. Marks were awarded similarly.
day, we decided on a little experiment. We'd trap our farts in empty
jam jars, screw the lids on then open and then sniff them next morning.
This is a particularly vile thing to do, as the odor is inhaled when
one is fragile from the night before, and makes one feel a tad unwell.
the games progressed, and we then discovered absinthe. Not the cheap
nasty stuff you usually find, but the proper syrupy green fluid with
loads of wormwood. We did the usual setting fire to it and so on, but
soon discovered that a few hours after drinking it, it tainted our
flatulence with a characteristic odor. So out came the jam jars....
morning, we came to open the jars to do the usual check, and to our
collective amazement, in each jar was a tiny model motorcycle. A
perfect replica of a full size Honda 650 in every way. We wondered who
had accessed the jars during the night, and why they would do such a
bizarre thing, so we asked around during the day, but no-one would
admit to it.
On returning to our flat that evening, we noticed
that the models had increased in size during the day. And that is the
point at which we discovered....
Absinthe makes the fart grow Honda.
- Add Comment -