It Seemed Like the Perfect Crime
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Yeah, we shoulda had the skinny guy do the inside jobs...

"Mini crimewave: The dwarf burglar who squeezed through tiny holes to help gang steal scrap metal"
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/textbased/news/...
"The diminutive criminal was recruited by burglars to get through holes that a full-sized person would be unable to enter, a court was told.

They stole scrap metal which they sold at local yards in Newcastle upon Tyne, splitting the proceeds.

Michael Crowe, defending Kildare, said his client was not only able to get inside buildings more easily but he was also - normally - more likely to evade capture. "

Curiously, they paint the pint-sized perp as a victim in this scenario,
"the 22-year-old was caught in the act when a police officer spotted his head poking through a small hole in the front door of a house he was raiding.

His partner in crime had fled, leaving him to take the rap.

Kildare was spared jail and given a community service order even though he had been convicted of a similar offence hours before carrying out this burglary.

...'He was able to get through a small hole in the house in question, and it is right to say he is taken advantage of on occasion by others,' he told Newcastle Magistrates' Court.

'They encourage him to participate in this activity because, as a result of his size, he finds it easier to get into smaller places.'"

The problem for the partners of Mr. Mini McBurglar (copper copper!) was that he liked to get a sip of something stiff before a job. 

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/... (with photo)
"A gang of burglars thought they had found the perfect accomplice – a dwarf able to clamber into derelict houses through the smallest of holes.

But they didn't count on Lee Kildare getting drunk while leading their scrap metal raid.

When police were called to a disturbance at a house in Newcastle in May, the 22-year-old promptly poked his head through a broken panel in the front door.

'He helped himself through the hole and was arrested. He was very drunk and said if the police hadn't arrived he would have stolen the copper.

'When asked about the scrap metal lying around the house, he couldn't remember anything about it but said he probably would have stolen that too,' prosecutor Fiona Varley told magistrates in Newcastle. "

Again. we're supposed to feel sorry for the fellow.
"Kildare, of Walker, Newcastle, admitted burglary and received a 12-month community order.

He said local gangs exploited him."

And you thought this was the biggest crime against little people...

Currently listening : Little By Little Release date: By 2008-06-03

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