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Dec 20, 2008

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 37
Sign: Cancer

State: South Carolina
Country: US

Signup Date: 05/22/05

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Monday, May 05, 2008


Not that I’m really a better person...
Current mood: validated
Category: Life

Sometimes I feel bad for picking on the ignorant and mentally infirm who seem to fill the pages of 'odd news', especially the stories that are copied over from the police blotter  Are we really so superior that we can point and sneer at such misfortunate but still noble and independent souls?

Yes, we are!

"Unsatisfying Sex Life Leads to Silverdale Woman's Meltdown"
"Kitsap County deputies were called to the apartment on the 11800 block of Majestic Lane NW at 2:38 a.m. after a neighbor overheard yelling, crying and slamming doors, the report said.

When deputies arrived, the woman denied any assault had taken place, and repeatedly, without sparing a vulgar euphemism, told the deputies about how unsatisfied she was with her sex life — some of the time carrying around a half-gallon of whiskey while doing so."

A half gallon of whiskey - that's just smart shopping.  And "Majestic Lane" sounds like a name that's trying too hard, like might be applied to, say, a trailer park or the kind of low-rent apartments that are just a thick pile of bricks with nothing breakable to adorn them.

"The meltdown, which deputies witnessed along with the couple's 3- and 4-year-old children, started when the husband, 24, had told his wife they had three hours to quit smoking, drinking, swearing and engaging in some sex acts because "they were going to be good Christians now," the woman said.

The man said she had woken him up to have relations, but then became disappointed and angry."

Three hours?  Good for him to have a plan and not just insist they quit cold turkey.  That hardly ever works.

"During an argument with one of the deputies, the woman picked up the family's 20-pound dog and threw it at the deputy, who caught it, the report said."

Nice catch! 

"The woman resisted being arrested for theft — her screams were described as "blood-curdling" by one of the deputies. The deputy who drove the woman to jail reported she questioned his manhood, asked God to forgive him because "he knows not what he does," and "donkey-kicked" him in the shin while he attempted to walk her from his patrol car to the jail, reports said."

Forgivness is for God to give.  But Kicks are for Cops!

"She was booked for second-degree theft and third-degree assault."

Hey, what about the dog??  Dog tossing has got to be a capital offense!

11:53 AM - 4 Comments - 4 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove -


OMG, this is TOO FUNNY. I really need a laugh today. And I am going to have to post this on my page. Too good to not share! Thanks Shawn, luv ya

Posted by Val on May 5, 2008 1:30 PM
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dogs, midgets, children, ya know...it's all tha same and besides, i'm sure tha dog woulda landed on its feet....wait, no that's cats...and that's just tooo funny! wow!

Posted by tina on May 5, 2008 2:19 PM
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Too Funny!!! You have WAY too much time on your hands mister!

Posted by Natalie on May 5, 2008 3:41 PM
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