Mamas, don’t let your boys grow up to be...
Current mood: hungry
Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
Mamas, don’t let your boys grow up to be clueless!!
was the long put-off grocery shopping trip, the one that happens only a
few times a year, after which people wonder how a single guy could
spend $400 in one shot at the grocery store. Really, today was
the ’listeless’ shopping trip - there’s no need for a list when one has
put it off so long that one needs _everything_.
the last aisle, smiling to see that 12 packs of Sam Adams Light are on
sale (instead of the six packs - thus telling me I need to drink extra
this month!), I angle for a check-out lane. Aha! There’s
one with a cashier and dedicated bagger, the customer is already
paying, and said customer happens to be the only cute gal I passed in
the whole store. Bonus.
So I bring up the cart, get my
discount card scanned, and watch stuff fly by the scanner.
Looking up, I see a problem right away. The bagger is what one
used to call a bag-boy. And this one is a sharp jawed youth,
probably a three-sport athlete in school, and probably smart too.
BUT HE’S NEVER IN HIS LIFE MANAGED A HOUSEHOLD KITCHEN. The only
solace is that I hadn’t pre-staged things the way I wanted them bagged,
for him to mess it up.
Getting home, the bag lottery begins...
In bag number one, with have three boxes of cereal - and a frozen dinner.
Oh, here’s the other box of cereal - with the vitamins and dog treats.
did explain to him about keeping cans together and not crushing other
things with them, but that didn’t keep the soup, chili, and beans being
Raw asparagus may look kinda shaggy, but I still don’t keep it with the razors and shaving gel.
well. Time to make up lunches for the week. Luckily, my
steaks have been pre-tenderized - by having a 12 pack of plastic soda
bottles set on top of them.
Before I go, just a note to mothers
everywhere: while your darling boy will only be 17 once, his Lacrosse
scholarship need not be the exclusive focus of life. It wouldn’t hurt
him to be drug to the store once in a blue moon and to lug stuff inside
for you every now and then. As I recall, from 12 years old and up
I was sometimes given my own shopping list and cart and sent off to
forage for the family.
p.s. Thanks to reading a bodybuilding mag
right before shopping, I bought some asparagus. Now what??
I think it normally gets cooked or something...
Led Zeppelin IV (aka ZOSO)
By Led Zeppelin
Release date: By 19 July, 1994
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